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That
I
had
the
kind
of
brother
I
did
.
One
whose
character
challenged
me
to
improve
my
own
.
One
whose
love
and
affection
enriched
my
life
.
That
my
children
were
n't
born
stupid
or
physically
deformed
.
That
I
was
n't
more
talented
in
rhetoric
or
poetry
,
or
other
areas
.
If
I
'd
felt
that
I
was
making
better
progress
I
might
never
have
given
them
up
.
That
I
conferred
on
the
people
who
brought
me
up
the
honors
they
seemed
to
want
early
on
,
instead
of
putting
them
off
(
since
they
were
still
young
)
with
the
hope
that
I
'd
do
it
later
.
That
I
knew
Apollonius
,
and
Rusticus
,
and
Maximus
.
That
I
was
shown
clearly
and
often
what
it
would
be
like
to
live
as
nature
requires
.
The
gods
did
all
they
could
--
through
their
gifts
,
their
help
,
their
inspiration
--
to
ensure
that
I
could
live
as
nature
demands
.
And
if
I
've
failed
,
it
's
no
one
's
fault
but
mine
.
Because
I
did
n't
pay
attention
to
what
they
told
me
--
to
what
they
taught
me
,
practically
,
step
by
step
.
That
my
body
has
held
out
,
especially
considering
the
life
I
've
led
.
That
I
never
laid
a
finger
on
Benedicta
or
on
Theodotus
.
And
that
even
later
,
when
I
was
overcome
by
passion
,
I
recovered
from
it
.
That
even
though
I
was
often
upset
with
Rusticus
I
never
did
anything
I
would
have
regretted
later
.
That
even
though
she
died
young
,
at
least
my
mother
spent
her
last
years
with
me
.
