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"
But
what
could
have
happened
?
What
did
I
want
?
I
want
his
death
!
"
she
cried
with
a
feeling
of
loathing
for
herself
.
She
washed
,
dressed
,
said
her
prayers
,
and
went
out
to
the
porch
.
In
front
of
it
stood
carriages
without
horses
and
things
were
being
packed
into
the
vehicles
.
It
was
a
warm
,
gray
morning
.
Princess
Mary
stopped
at
the
porch
,
still
horrified
by
her
spiritual
baseness
and
trying
to
arrange
her
thoughts
before
going
to
her
father
.
The
doctor
came
downstairs
and
went
out
to
her
.
"
He
is
a
little
better
today
,
"
said
he
.
"
I
was
looking
for
you
.
One
can
make
out
something
of
what
he
is
saying
.
His
head
is
clearer
.
Come
in
,
he
is
asking
for
you
...
"
Princess
Mary
's
heart
beat
so
violently
at
this
news
that
she
grew
pale
and
leaned
against
the
wall
to
keep
from
falling
.
To
see
him
,
talk
to
him
,
feel
his
eyes
on
her
now
that
her
whole
soul
was
overflowing
with
those
dreadful
,
wicked
temptations
,
was
a
torment
of
joy
and
terror
.
"
Come
,
"
said
the
doctor
.
Princess
Mary
entered
her
father
's
room
and
went
up
to
his
bed
.
He
was
lying
on
his
back
propped
up
high
,
and
his
small
bony
hands
with
their
knotted
purple
veins
were
lying
on
the
quilt
;
his
left
eye
gazed
straight
before
him
,
his
right
eye
was
awry
,
and
his
brows
and
lips
motionless
.
He
seemed
altogether
so
thin
,
small
,
and
pathetic
.
His
face
seemed
to
have
shriveled
or
melted
;
his
features
had
grown
smaller
.
Princess
Mary
went
up
and
kissed
his
hand
.
His
left
hand
pressed
hers
so
that
she
understood
that
he
had
long
been
waiting
for
her
to
come
.
He
twitched
her
hand
,
and
his
brows
and
lips
quivered
angrily
.
She
looked
at
him
in
dismay
trying
to
guess
what
he
wanted
of
her
.
When
she
changed
her
position
so
that
his
left
eye
could
see
her
face
he
calmed
down
,
not
taking
his
eyes
off
her
for
some
seconds
.
Then
his
lips
and
tongue
moved
,
sounds
came
,
and
he
began
to
speak
,
gazing
timidly
and
imploringly
at
her
,
evidently
afraid
that
she
might
not
understand
.
Straining
all
her
faculties
Princess
Mary
looked
at
him
.
The
comic
efforts
with
which
he
moved
his
tongue
made
her
drop
her
eyes
and
with
difficulty
repress
the
sobs
that
rose
to
her
throat
.
He
said
something
,
repeating
the
same
words
several
times
.
She
could
not
understand
them
,
but
tried
to
guess
what
he
was
saying
and
inquiringly
repeated
the
words
he
uttered
.
"
Mmm
...
ar
...
ate
...
ate
...
"
he
repeated
several
times
.