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December
4
.
Today
when
Andrúsha
(
her
eldest
boy
)
woke
up
he
did
not
wish
to
dress
and
Mademoiselle
Louise
sent
for
me
.
He
was
naughty
and
obstinate
.
I
tried
threats
,
but
he
only
grew
angrier
.
Then
I
took
the
matter
in
hand
:
I
left
him
alone
and
began
with
nurse
's
help
to
get
the
other
children
up
,
telling
him
that
I
did
not
love
him
.
For
a
long
time
he
was
silent
,
as
if
astonished
,
then
he
jumped
out
of
bed
,
ran
to
me
in
his
shirt
,
and
sobbed
so
that
I
could
not
calm
him
for
a
long
time
.
It
was
plain
that
what
troubled
him
most
was
that
he
had
grieved
me
.
Afterwards
in
the
evening
when
I
gave
him
his
ticket
,
he
again
began
crying
piteously
and
kissing
me
.
One
can
do
anything
with
him
by
tenderness
.
"
What
is
a
'
ticket
'
?
"
Nicholas
inquired
.
"
I
have
begun
giving
the
elder
ones
marks
every
evening
,
showing
how
they
have
behaved
.
"
Nicholas
looked
into
the
radiant
eyes
that
were
gazing
at
him
,
and
continued
to
turn
over
the
pages
and
read
.
In
the
diary
was
set
down
everything
in
the
children
's
lives
that
seemed
noteworthy
to
their
mother
as
showing
their
characters
or
suggesting
general
reflections
on
educational
methods
.
They
were
for
the
most
part
quite
insignificant
trifles
,
but
did
not
seem
so
to
the
mother
or
to
the
father
either
,
now
that
he
read
this
diary
about
his
children
for
the
first
time
.
Under
the
date
"
5
"
was
entered
:
Mítya
was
naughty
at
table
.
Papa
said
he
was
to
have
no
pudding
.
He
had
none
,
but
looked
so
unhappily
and
greedily
at
the
others
while
they
were
eating
!
I
think
that
punishment
by
depriving
children
of
sweets
only
develops
their
greediness
.
Must
tell
Nicholas
this
.
Nicholas
put
down
the
book
and
looked
at
his
wife
.
The
radiant
eyes
gazed
at
him
questioningly
:
would
he
approve
or
disapprove
of
her
diary
?
There
could
be
no
doubt
not
only
of
his
approval
but
also
of
his
admiration
for
his
wife
.
Perhaps
it
need
not
be
done
so
pedantically
,
thought
Nicholas
,
or
even
done
at
all
,
but
this
untiring
,
continual
spiritual
effort
of
which
the
sole
aim
was
the
children
's
moral
welfare
delighted
him
.
Had
Nicholas
been
able
to
analyze
his
feelings
he
would
have
found
that
his
steady
,
tender
,
and
proud
love
of
his
wife
rested
on
his
feeling
of
wonder
at
her
spirituality
and
at
the
lofty
moral
world
,
almost
beyond
his
reach
,
in
which
she
had
her
being
.
