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Just
then
he
was
only
anxious
to
get
away
as
quickly
as
possible
from
places
where
people
were
killing
one
another
,
to
some
peaceful
refuge
where
he
could
recover
himself
,
rest
,
and
think
over
all
the
strange
new
facts
he
had
learned
;
but
on
reaching
Orël
he
immediately
fell
ill
.
When
he
came
to
himself
after
his
illness
he
saw
in
attendance
on
him
two
of
his
servants
,
Terénty
and
Váska
,
who
had
come
from
Moscow
;
and
also
his
cousin
the
eldest
princess
,
who
had
been
living
on
his
estate
at
Eléts
and
hearing
of
his
rescue
and
illness
had
come
to
look
after
him
.
It
was
only
gradually
during
his
convalescence
that
Pierre
lost
the
impressions
he
had
become
accustomed
to
during
the
last
few
months
and
got
used
to
the
idea
that
no
one
would
oblige
him
to
go
anywhere
tomorrow
,
that
no
one
would
deprive
him
of
his
warm
bed
,
and
that
he
would
be
sure
to
get
his
dinner
,
tea
,
and
supper
.
But
for
a
long
time
in
his
dreams
he
still
saw
himself
in
the
conditions
of
captivity
.
In
the
same
way
little
by
little
he
came
to
understand
the
news
he
had
been
told
after
his
rescue
,
about
the
death
of
Prince
Andrew
,
the
death
of
his
wife
,
and
the
destruction
of
the
French
.
A
joyous
feeling
of
freedom
--
that
complete
inalienable
freedom
natural
to
man
which
he
had
first
experienced
at
the
first
halt
outside
Moscow
--
filled
Pierre
's
soul
during
his
convalescence
.
He
was
surprised
to
find
that
this
inner
freedom
,
which
was
independent
of
external
conditions
,
now
had
as
it
were
an
additional
setting
of
external
liberty
.
He
was
alone
in
a
strange
town
,
without
acquaintances
.
No
one
demanded
anything
of
him
or
sent
him
anywhere
.
He
had
all
he
wanted
:
the
thought
of
his
wife
which
had
been
a
continual
torment
to
him
was
no
longer
there
,
since
she
was
no
more
.
"
Oh
,
how
good
!
How
splendid
!
"
said
he
to
himself
when
a
cleanly
laid
table
was
moved
up
to
him
with
savory
beef
tea
,
or
when
he
lay
down
for
the
night
on
a
soft
clean
bed
,
or
when
he
remembered
that
the
French
had
gone
and
that
his
wife
was
no
more
.
"
Oh
,
how
good
,
how
splendid
!
"
And
by
old
habit
he
asked
himself
the
question
:
"
Well
,
and
what
then
?
What
am
I
going
to
do
?
"
And
he
immediately
gave
himself
the
answer
:
"
Well
,
I
shall
live
.
Ah
,
how
splendid
!
"
The
very
question
that
had
formerly
tormented
him
,
the
thing
he
had
continually
sought
to
find
--
the
aim
of
life
--
no
longer
existed
for
him
now
.
That
search
for
the
aim
of
life
had
not
merely
disappeared
temporarily
--
he
felt
that
it
no
longer
existed
for
him
and
could
not
present
itself
again
.
And
this
very
absence
of
an
aim
gave
him
the
complete
,
joyous
sense
of
freedom
which
constituted
his
happiness
at
this
time
.
He
could
not
see
an
aim
,
for
he
now
had
faith
--
not
faith
in
any
kind
of
rule
,
or
words
,
or
ideas
,
but
faith
in
an
ever-living
,
ever-manifest
God
.
Formerly
he
had
sought
Him
in
aims
he
set
himself
.
That
search
for
an
aim
had
been
simply
a
search
for
God
,
and
suddenly
in
his
captivity
he
had
learned
not
by
words
or
reasoning
but
by
direct
feeling
what
his
nurse
had
told
him
long
ago
:
that
God
is
here
and
everywhere
.
In
his
captivity
he
had
learned
that
in
Karatáev
God
was
greater
,
more
infinite
and
unfathomable
than
in
the
Architect
of
the
Universe
recognized
by
the
Freemasons
.
He
felt
like
a
man
who
after
straining
his
eyes
to
see
into
the
far
distance
finds
what
he
sought
at
his
very
feet
.
All
his
life
he
had
looked
over
the
heads
of
the
men
around
him
,
when
he
should
have
merely
looked
in
front
of
him
without
straining
his
eyes
.
In
the
past
he
had
never
been
able
to
find
that
great
inscrutable
infinite
something
.
He
had
only
felt
that
it
must
exist
somewhere
and
had
looked
for
it
.
In
everything
near
and
comprehensible
he
had
seen
only
what
was
limited
,
petty
,
commonplace
,
and
senseless
.
He
had
equipped
himself
with
a
mental
telescope
and
looked
into
remote
space
,
where
petty
worldliness
hiding
itself
in
misty
distance
had
seemed
to
him
great
and
infinite
merely
because
it
was
not
clearly
seen
.
And
such
had
European
life
,
politics
,
Freemasonry
,
philosophy
,
and
philanthropy
seemed
to
him
.
But
even
then
,
at
moments
of
weakness
as
he
had
accounted
them
,
his
mind
had
penetrated
to
those
distances
and
he
had
there
seen
the
same
pettiness
,
worldliness
,
and
senselessness
.
Now
,
however
,
he
had
learned
to
see
the
great
,
eternal
,
and
infinite
in
everything
,
and
therefore
--
to
see
it
and
enjoy
its
contemplation
--
he
naturally
threw
away
the
telescope
through
which
he
had
till
now
gazed
over
men
's
heads
,
and
gladly
regarded
the
ever-changing
,
eternally
great
,
unfathomable
,
and
infinite
life
around
him
.
And
the
closer
he
looked
the
more
tranquil
and
happy
he
became
.
That
dreadful
question
,
"
What
for
?
"
which
had
formerly
destroyed
all
his
mental
edifices
,
no
longer
existed
for
him
