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The
time
passed
in
such
meditations
,
and
when
the
teacher
came
,
the
lesson
about
the
adverbs
of
place
and
time
and
manner
of
action
was
not
ready
,
and
the
teacher
was
not
only
displeased
,
but
hurt
.
This
touched
Seryozha
.
He
felt
he
was
not
to
blame
for
not
having
learned
the
lesson
;
however
much
he
tried
,
he
was
utterly
unable
to
do
that
.
As
long
as
the
teacher
was
explaining
to
him
,
he
believed
him
and
seemed
to
comprehend
,
but
as
soon
as
he
was
left
alone
,
he
was
positively
unable
to
recollect
and
to
understand
that
the
short
and
familiar
word
suddenly
is
an
adverb
of
manner
of
action
.
Still
he
was
sorry
that
he
had
disappointed
the
teacher
.
He
chose
a
moment
when
the
teacher
was
looking
in
silence
at
the
book
.
Mihail
Ivanitch
,
when
is
your
birthday
?
he
asked
all
,
of
a
sudden
.
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You
d
much
better
be
thinking
about
your
work
.
Birthdays
are
of
no
importance
to
a
rational
being
.
It
s
a
day
like
any
other
on
which
one
has
to
do
one
s
work
.
Seryozha
looked
intently
at
the
teacher
,
at
his
scanty
beard
,
at
his
spectacles
,
which
had
slipped
down
below
the
ridge
on
his
nose
,
and
fell
into
so
deep
a
reverie
that
he
heard
nothing
of
what
the
teacher
was
explaining
to
him
He
knew
that
the
teacher
did
not
think
what
he
said
;
he
felt
it
from
the
tone
in
which
it
was
said
.
But
why
have
they
all
agreed
to
speak
just
in
the
same
manner
always
the
dreariest
and
most
useless
stuff
?
Why
does
he
keep
me
off
;
why
doesn
t
he
love
me
?
he
asked
himself
mournfully
,
and
could
not
think
of
an
answer
.
After
the
lesson
with
the
grammar
teacher
came
his
father
s
lesson
.
While
waiting
for
his
father
,
Seryozha
sat
at
the
table
playing
with
a
penknife
,
and
fell
to
dreaming
.
Among
Seryozha
s
favorite
occupations
was
searching
for
his
mother
during
his
walks
.
He
did
not
believe
in
death
generally
,
and
in
her
death
in
particular
,
in
spite
of
what
Lidia
Ivanovna
had
told
him
and
his
father
had
confirmed
,
and
it
was
just
because
of
that
,
and
after
he
had
been
told
she
was
dead
,
that
he
had
begun
looking
for
her
when
out
for
a
walk
.
Every
woman
of
full
,
graceful
figure
with
dark
hair
was
his
mother
.
At
the
sight
of
such
a
woman
such
a
feeling
of
tenderness
was
stirred
within
him
that
his
breath
failed
him
,
and
tears
came
into
his
eyes
.
And
he
was
on
the
tiptoe
of
expectation
that
she
would
come
up
to
him
,
would
lift
her
veil
.
All
her
face
would
be
visible
,
she
would
smile
,
she
would
hug
him
,
he
would
sniff
her
fragrance
,
feel
the
softness
of
her
arms
,
and
cry
with
happiness
,
just
as
he
had
one
evening
lain
on
her
lap
while
she
tickled
him
,
and
he
laughed
and
bit
her
white
,
ring
-
covered
fingers
.
Later
,
when
he
accidentally
learned
from
his
old
nurse
that
his
mother
was
not
dead
,
and
his
father
and
Lidia
Ivanovna
had
explained
to
him
that
she
was
dead
to
him
because
she
was
wicked
(
which
he
could
not
possibly
believe
,
because
he
loved
her
)
,
he
went
on
seeking
her
and
expecting
her
in
the
same
way
.
That
day
in
the
public
gardens
there
had
been
a
lady
in
a
lilac
veil
,
whom
he
had
watched
with
a
throbbing
heart
,
believing
it
to
be
she
as
she
came
towards
them
along
the
path
.
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The
lady
had
not
come
up
to
them
,
but
had
disappeared
somewhere
.
That
day
,
more
intensely
than
ever
,
Seryozha
felt
a
rush
of
love
for
her
,
and
now
,
waiting
for
his
father
,
he
forgot
everything
,
and
cut
all
round
the
edge
of
the
table
with
his
penknife
,
staring
straight
before
him
with
sparkling
eyes
and
dreaming
of
her
.
Here
is
your
papa
!
said
Vassily
Lukitch
,
rousing
him
.
Seryozha
jumped
up
and
went
up
to
his
father
,
and
kissing
his
hand
,
looked
at
him
intently
,
trying
to
discover
signs
of
his
joy
at
receiving
the
Alexander
Nevsky
.