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- Генри Джеймс
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- Стр. 64/93
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I
fairly
held
my
breath
a
minute
,
and
even
from
my
glimmering
taper
there
was
light
enough
to
show
how
he
smiled
up
at
me
from
his
pillow
.
"
What
do
you
mean
by
all
the
rest
?
"
"
Oh
,
you
know
,
you
know
!
"
I
could
say
nothing
for
a
minute
,
though
I
felt
,
as
I
held
his
hand
and
our
eyes
continued
to
meet
,
that
my
silence
had
all
the
air
of
admitting
his
charge
and
that
nothing
in
the
whole
world
of
reality
was
perhaps
at
that
moment
so
fabulous
as
our
actual
relation
.
"
Certainly
you
shall
go
back
to
school
,
"
I
said
,
"
if
it
be
that
that
troubles
you
.
But
not
to
the
old
place
--
we
must
find
another
,
a
better
.
How
could
I
know
it
did
trouble
you
,
this
question
,
when
you
never
told
me
so
,
never
spoke
of
it
at
all
?
"
His
clear
,
listening
face
,
framed
in
its
smooth
whiteness
,
made
him
for
the
minute
as
appealing
as
some
wistful
patient
in
a
children
's
hospital
;
and
I
would
have
given
,
as
the
resemblance
came
to
me
,
all
I
possessed
on
earth
really
to
be
the
nurse
or
the
sister
of
charity
who
might
have
helped
to
cure
him
.
Well
,
even
as
it
was
,
I
perhaps
might
help
!
"
Do
you
know
you
've
never
said
a
word
to
me
about
your
school
--
I
mean
the
old
one
;
never
mentioned
it
in
any
way
?
"
He
seemed
to
wonder
;
he
smiled
with
the
same
loveliness
.
But
he
clearly
gained
time
;
he
waited
,
he
called
for
guidance
.
"
Have
n't
I
?
"
It
was
n't
for
me
to
help
him
--
it
was
for
the
thing
I
had
met
!
Something
in
his
tone
and
the
expression
of
his
face
,
as
I
got
this
from
him
,
set
my
heart
aching
with
such
a
pang
as
it
had
never
yet
known
;
so
unutterably
touching
was
it
to
see
his
little
brain
puzzled
and
his
little
resources
taxed
to
play
,
under
the
spell
laid
on
him
,
a
part
of
innocence
and
consistency
.
"
No
,
never
--
from
the
hour
you
came
back
.
You
've
never
mentioned
to
me
one
of
your
masters
,
one
of
your
comrades
,
nor
the
least
little
thing
that
ever
happened
to
you
at
school
.
Never
,
little
Miles
--
no
,
never
--
have
you
given
me
an
inkling
of
anything
that
may
have
happened
there
.
Therefore
you
can
fancy
how
much
I
'm
in
the
dark
.
Until
you
came
out
,
that
way
,
this
morning
,
you
had
,
since
the
first
hour
I
saw
you
,
scarce
even
made
a
reference
to
anything
in
your
previous
life
.
You
seemed
so
perfectly
to
accept
the
present
.
"
It
was
extraordinary
how
my
absolute
conviction
of
his
secret
precocity
(
or
whatever
I
might
call
the
poison
of
an
influence
that
I
dared
but
half
to
phrase
)
made
him
,
in
spite
of
the
faint
breath
of
his
inward
trouble
,
appear
as
accessible
as
an
older
person
--
imposed
him
almost
as
an
intellectual
equal
.
"
I
thought
you
wanted
to
go
on
as
you
are
.
"
It
struck
me
that
at
this
he
just
faintly
colored
.
He
gave
,
at
any
rate
,
like
a
convalescent
slightly
fatigued
,
a
languid
shake
of
his
head
.
"
I
do
n't
--
I
do
n't
.
I
want
to
get
away
.
"
"
You
're
tired
of
Bly
?
"
"
Oh
,
no
,
I
like
Bly
.
"
