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The
coach
fumed
helplessly
,
the
Triangle
Club
president
,
glowering
with
anxiety
,
varied
between
furious
bursts
of
authority
and
fits
of
temperamental
lassitude
,
when
he
sat
spiritless
and
wondered
how
the
devil
the
show
was
ever
going
on
tour
by
Christmas
.
"
All
right
.
We
'll
take
the
pirate
song
.
"
The
ponies
took
last
drags
at
their
cigarettes
and
slumped
into
place
;
the
leading
lady
rushed
into
the
foreground
,
setting
his
hands
and
feet
in
an
atmospheric
mince
;
and
as
the
coach
clapped
and
stamped
and
tumped
and
da-da
'd
,
they
hashed
out
a
dance
.
A
great
,
seething
ant-hill
was
the
Triangle
Club
.
It
gave
a
musical
comedy
every
year
,
travelling
with
cast
,
chorus
,
orchestra
,
and
scenery
all
through
Christmas
vacation
.
The
play
and
music
were
the
work
of
undergraduates
,
and
the
club
itself
was
the
most
influential
of
institutions
,
over
three
hundred
men
competing
for
it
every
year
.
Amory
,
after
an
easy
victory
in
the
first
sophomore
Princetonian
competition
,
stepped
into
a
vacancy
of
the
cast
as
Boiling
Oil
,
a
Pirate
Lieutenant
.
Every
night
for
the
last
week
they
had
rehearsed
"
Ha-Ha
Hortense
!
"
in
the
Casino
,
from
two
in
the
afternoon
until
eight
in
the
morning
,
sustained
by
dark
and
powerful
coffee
,
and
sleeping
in
lectures
through
the
interim
.
A
rare
scene
,
the
Casino
.
A
big
,
barnlike
auditorium
,
dotted
with
boys
as
girls
,
boys
as
pirates
,
boys
as
babies
;
the
scenery
in
course
of
being
violently
set
up
;
the
spotlight
man
rehearsing
by
throwing
weird
shafts
into
angry
eyes
;
over
all
the
constant
tuning
of
the
orchestra
or
the
cheerful
tumpty-tump
of
a
Triangle
tune
.
The
boy
who
writes
the
lyrics
stands
in
the
corner
,
biting
a
pencil
,
with
twenty
minutes
to
think
of
an
encore
;
the
business
manager
argues
with
the
secretary
as
to
how
much
money
can
be
spent
on
"
those
damn
milkmaid
costumes
"
;
the
old
graduate
,
president
in
ninety-eight
,
perches
on
a
box
and
thinks
how
much
simpler
it
was
in
his
day
.
How
a
Triangle
show
ever
got
off
was
a
mystery
,
but
it
was
a
riotous
mystery
,
anyway
,
whether
or
not
one
did
enough
service
to
wear
a
little
gold
Triangle
on
his
watch-chain
.
"
Ha-Ha
Hortense
!
"
was
written
over
six
times
and
had
the
names
of
nine
collaborators
on
the
programme
.
All
Triangle
shows
started
by
being
"
something
different
--
not
just
a
regular
musical
comedy
,
"
but
when
the
several
authors
,
the
president
,
the
coach
and
the
faculty
committee
finished
with
it
,
there
remained
just
the
old
reliable
Triangle
show
with
the
old
reliable
jokes
and
the
star
comedian
who
got
expelled
or
sick
or
something
just
before
the
trip
,
and
the
dark-whiskered
man
in
the
pony-ballet
,
who
"
absolutely
wo
n't
shave
twice
a
day
,
doggone
it
!
"
There
was
one
brilliant
place
in
"
Ha-Ha
Hortense
!
"
It
is
a
Princeton
tradition
that
whenever
a
Yale
man
who
is
a
member
of
the
widely
advertised
"
Skull
and
Bones
"
hears
the
sacred
name
mentioned
,
he
must
leave
the
room
.
It
is
also
a
tradition
that
the
members
are
invariably
successful
in
later
life
,
amassing
fortunes
or
votes
or
coupons
or
whatever
they
choose
to
amass
.
Therefore
,
at
each
performance
of
"
Ha-Ha
Hortense
!
"
half-a-dozen
seats
were
kept
from
sale
and
occupied
by
six
of
the
worst-looking
vagabonds
that
could
be
hired
from
the
streets
,
further
touched
up
by
the
Triangle
make-up
man
.
At
the
moment
in
the
show
where
Firebrand
,
the
Pirate
Chief
,
pointed
at
his
black
flag
and
said
,
"
I
am
a
Yale
graduate
--
note
my
Skull
and
Bones
!
"
--
at
this
very
moment
the
six
vagabonds
were
instructed
to
rise
conspicuously
and
leave
the
theatre
with
looks
of
deep
melancholy
and
an
injured
dignity
.
It
was
claimed
though
never
proved
that
on
one
occasion
the
hired
Elis
were
swelled
by
one
of
the
real
thing
.
They
played
through
vacation
to
the
fashionable
of
eight
cities
.