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"
Evgenie
Pavlovitch
,
"
he
said
,
with
strange
excitement
and
seizing
the
latter
's
hand
in
his
own
,
"
be
assured
that
I
esteem
you
as
a
generous
and
honourable
man
,
in
spite
of
everything
.
Be
assured
of
that
.
"
Evgenie
Pavlovitch
fell
back
a
step
in
astonishment
.
For
one
moment
it
was
all
he
could
do
to
restrain
himself
from
bursting
out
laughing
;
but
,
looking
closer
,
he
observed
that
the
prince
did
not
seem
to
be
quite
himself
;
at
all
events
,
he
was
in
a
very
curious
state
.
"
I
would
n't
mind
betting
,
prince
,
"
he
cried
,
"
that
you
did
not
in
the
least
mean
to
say
that
,
and
very
likely
you
meant
to
address
someone
else
altogether
.
What
is
it
?
Are
you
feeling
unwell
or
anything
?
"
"
Very
likely
,
extremely
likely
,
and
you
must
be
a
very
close
observer
to
detect
the
fact
that
perhaps
I
did
not
intend
to
come
up
to
you
at
all
.
"
So
saying
he
smiled
strangely
;
but
suddenly
and
excitedly
he
began
again
:
"
Do
n't
remind
me
of
what
I
have
done
or
said
.
Do
n't
!
I
am
very
much
ashamed
of
myself
,
I
--
"
"
Why
,
what
have
you
done
?
I
do
n't
understand
you
.
"
"
I
see
you
are
ashamed
of
me
,
Evgenie
Pavlovitch
;
you
are
blushing
for
me
;
that
's
a
sign
of
a
good
heart
.
Do
n't
be
afraid
;
I
shall
go
away
directly
.
"
"
What
's
the
matter
with
him
?
Do
his
fits
begin
like
that
?
"
said
Lizabetha
Prokofievna
,
in
a
high
state
of
alarm
,
addressing
Colia
.
"
No
,
no
,
Lizabetha
Prokofievna
,
take
no
notice
of
me
.
I
am
not
going
to
have
a
fit
.
I
will
go
away
directly
;
but
I
know
I
am
afflicted
.
I
was
twenty-four
years
an
invalid
,
you
see
--
the
first
twenty-four
years
of
my
life
--
so
take
all
I
do
and
say
as
the
sayings
and
actions
of
an
invalid
.
I
'm
going
away
directly
,
I
really
am
--
do
n't
be
afraid
.
I
am
not
blushing
,
for
I
do
n't
think
I
need
blush
about
it
,
need
I
?
But
I
see
that
I
am
out
of
place
in
society
--
society
is
better
without
me
.
It
's
not
vanity
,
I
assure
you
.
I
have
thought
over
it
all
these
last
three
days
,
and
I
have
made
up
my
mind
that
I
ought
to
unbosom
myself
candidly
before
you
at
the
first
opportunity
.
There
are
certain
things
,
certain
great
ideas
,
which
I
must
not
so
much
as
approach
,
as
Prince
S.
has
just
reminded
me
,
or
I
shall
make
you
all
laugh
.
I
have
no
sense
of
proportion
,
I
know
;
my
words
and
gestures
do
not
express
my
ideas
--
they
are
a
humiliation
and
abasement
of
the
ideas
,
and
therefore
,
I
have
no
right
--
and
I
am
too
sensitive
.
Still
,
I
believe
I
am
beloved
in
this
household
,
and
esteemed
far
more
than
I
deserve
.
But
I
ca
n't
help
knowing
that
after
twenty-four
years
of
illness
there
must
be
some
trace
left
,
so
that
it
is
impossible
for
people
to
refrain
from
laughing
at
me
sometimes
;
do
n't
you
think
so
?
"
