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When
I
was
awake
after
the
operation
I
had
not
been
away
.
You
do
not
go
away
.
They
only
choke
you
.
It
is
not
like
dying
it
is
just
a
chemical
choking
so
you
do
not
feel
,
and
afterward
you
might
as
well
have
been
drunk
except
that
when
you
throw
up
nothing
comes
but
bile
and
you
do
not
feel
better
afterward
.
I
saw
sandbags
at
the
end
of
the
bed
.
They
were
on
pipes
that
came
out
of
the
cast
.
After
a
while
I
saw
Miss
Gage
and
she
said
,
"
How
is
it
now
?
"
"
Better
,
"
I
said
.
"
He
did
a
wonderful
job
on
your
knee
.
"
"
How
long
did
it
take
?
"
"
Two
hours
and
a
half
.
"
"
Did
I
say
anything
silly
?
"
"
Not
a
thing
.
Don
’
t
talk
.
Just
be
quiet
.
"
I
was
sick
and
Catherine
was
right
.
It
did
not
make
any
difference
who
was
on
night
duty
.
There
were
three
other
patients
in
the
hospital
now
,
a
thin
boy
in
the
Red
Cross
from
Georgia
with
malaria
,
a
nice
boy
,
also
thin
,
from
New
York
,
with
malaria
and
jaundice
,
and
a
fine
boy
who
had
tried
to
unscrew
the
fuse
-
cap
from
a
combination
shrapnel
and
high
explosive
shell
for
a
souvenir
.
This
was
a
shrapnel
shell
used
by
the
Austrians
in
the
mountains
with
a
nose
-
cap
which
went
on
after
the
burst
and
exploded
on
contact
.
Catherine
Barkley
was
greatly
liked
by
the
nurses
because
she
would
do
night
duty
indefinitely
.
She
had
quite
a
little
work
with
the
malaria
people
,
the
boy
who
had
unscrewed
the
nose
-
cap
was
a
friend
of
ours
and
never
rang
at
night
,
unless
it
was
necessary
but
between
the
times
of
working
we
were
together
.
I
loved
her
very
much
and
she
loved
me
.
