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- Джозеф Конрад
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- Лорд Джим
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- Стр. 28/107
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In
this
assault
upon
his
fortitude
there
was
the
jeering
intention
of
a
spiteful
and
vile
vengeance
;
there
was
an
element
of
burlesque
in
his
ordeal
--
a
degradation
of
funny
grimaces
in
the
approach
of
death
or
dishonour
.
'
He
related
facts
which
I
have
not
forgotten
,
but
at
this
distance
of
time
I
could
n't
recall
his
very
words
:
I
only
remember
that
he
managed
wonderfully
to
convey
the
brooding
rancour
of
his
mind
into
the
bare
recital
of
events
.
Twice
,
he
told
me
,
he
shut
his
eyes
in
the
certitude
that
the
end
was
upon
him
already
,
and
twice
he
had
to
open
them
again
.
Each
time
he
noted
the
darkening
of
the
great
stillness
.
The
shadow
of
the
silent
cloud
had
fallen
upon
the
ship
from
the
zenith
,
and
seemed
to
have
extinguished
every
sound
of
her
teeming
life
.
He
could
no
longer
hear
the
voices
under
the
awnings
.
He
told
me
that
each
time
he
closed
his
eyes
a
flash
of
thought
showed
him
that
crowd
of
bodies
,
laid
out
for
death
,
as
plain
as
daylight
.
When
he
opened
them
,
it
was
to
see
the
dim
struggle
of
four
men
fighting
like
mad
with
a
stubborn
boat
.
"
They
would
fall
back
before
it
time
after
time
,
stand
swearing
at
each
other
,
and
suddenly
make
another
rush
in
a
bunch
...
Enough
to
make
you
die
laughing
,
"
he
commented
with
downcast
eyes
;
then
raising
them
for
a
moment
to
my
face
with
a
dismal
smile
,
"
I
ought
to
have
a
merry
life
of
it
,
by
God
!
for
I
shall
see
that
funny
sight
a
good
many
times
yet
before
I
die
.
"
His
eyes
fell
again
.
"
See
and
hear
...
See
and
hear
,
"
he
repeated
twice
,
at
long
intervals
,
filled
by
vacant
staring
.
'
He
roused
himself
.
"'
I
made
up
my
mind
to
keep
my
eyes
shut
,
"
he
said
,
"
and
I
could
n't
.
I
could
n't
,
and
I
do
n't
care
who
knows
it
.
Let
them
go
through
that
kind
of
thing
before
they
talk
.
Just
let
them
--
and
do
better
--
that
's
all
.
The
second
time
my
eyelids
flew
open
and
my
mouth
too
.
I
had
felt
the
ship
move
.
She
just
dipped
her
bows
--
and
lifted
them
gently
--
and
slow
!
everlastingly
slow
;
and
ever
so
little
.
She
had
n't
done
that
much
for
days
.
The
cloud
had
raced
ahead
,
and
this
first
swell
seemed
to
travel
upon
a
sea
of
lead
.
There
was
no
life
in
that
stir
.
It
managed
,
though
,
to
knock
over
something
in
my
head
.
What
would
you
have
done
?
You
are
sure
of
yourself
--
are
n't
you
?
What
would
you
do
if
you
felt
now
--
this
minute
--
the
house
here
move
,
just
move
a
little
under
your
chair
.
Leap
!
By
heavens
!
you
would
take
one
spring
from
where
you
sit
and
land
in
that
clump
of
bushes
yonder
.
"
'
He
flung
his
arm
out
at
the
night
beyond
the
stone
balustrade
.
I
held
my
peace
.
He
looked
at
me
very
steadily
,
very
severe
.
There
could
be
no
mistake
:
I
was
being
bullied
now
,
and
it
behoved
me
to
make
no
sign
lest
by
a
gesture
or
a
word
I
should
be
drawn
into
a
fatal
admission
about
myself
which
would
have
had
some
bearing
on
the
case
.
I
was
not
disposed
to
take
any
risk
of
that
sort
.
Do
n't
forget
I
had
him
before
me
,
and
really
he
was
too
much
like
one
of
us
not
to
be
dangerous
.
But
if
you
want
to
know
I
do
n't
mind
telling
you
that
I
did
,
with
a
rapid
glance
,
estimate
the
distance
to
the
mass
of
denser
blackness
in
the
middle
of
the
grass-plot
before
the
verandah
.
He
exaggerated
.
I
would
have
landed
short
by
several
feet
--
and
that
's
the
only
thing
of
which
I
am
fairly
certain
.
'
The
last
moment
had
come
,
as
he
thought
,
and
he
did
not
move
.
His
feet
remained
glued
to
the
planks
if
his
thoughts
were
knocking
about
loose
in
his
head
.
It
was
at
this
moment
too
that
he
saw
one
of
the
men
around
the
boat
step
backwards
suddenly
,
clutch
at
the
air
with
raised
arms
,
totter
and
collapse
.
He
did
n't
exactly
fall
,
he
only
slid
gently
into
a
sitting
posture
,
all
hunched
up
,
and
with
his
shoulders
propped
against
the
side
of
the
engine-room
skylight
.
"
That
was
the
donkey-man
.
A
haggard
,
white-faced
chap
with
a
ragged
moustache
.
Acted
third
engineer
,
"
he
explained
.
"'
Dead
,
"
I
said
.
We
had
heard
something
of
that
in
court
.
"'
So
they
say
,
"
he
pronounced
with
sombre
indifference
.
"
Of
course
I
never
knew
.
Weak
heart
.
The
man
had
been
complaining
of
being
out
of
sorts
for
some
time
before
.
Excitement
.
Over-exertion
.
Devil
only
knows
.
Ha
!
ha
!
ha
!
It
was
easy
to
see
he
did
not
want
to
die
either
.
Droll
,
is
n't
it
?
May
I
be
shot
if
he
had
n't
been
fooled
into
killing
himself
!
Fooled
--
neither
more
nor
less
.
Fooled
into
it
,
by
heavens
!
just
as
I.
.
.
Ah
!
If
he
had
only
kept
still
;
if
he
had
only
told
them
to
go
to
the
devil
when
they
came
to
rush
him
out
of
his
bunk
because
the
ship
was
sinking
!
If
he
had
only
stood
by
with
his
hands
in
his
pockets
and
called
them
names
!
"
