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- Джозеф Хеллер
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- Уловка 22
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- Стр. 436/452
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"
Let
them
send
me
home
because
I
flew
more
than
fifty
missions
,
"
Yossarian
said
,
"
and
not
because
I
was
stabbed
by
that
girl
,
or
because
I
’
ve
turned
into
such
a
stubborn
son
of
a
bitch
.
"
Major
Danby
shook
his
head
emphatically
in
sincere
and
bespectacled
vexation
.
"
They
’
d
have
to
send
nearly
every
man
home
if
they
did
that
.
Most
of
the
men
have
more
than
fifty
missions
.
Colonel
Cathcart
couldn
’
t
possibly
requisition
so
many
inexperienced
replacement
crews
at
one
time
without
causing
an
investigation
.
He
’
s
caught
in
his
own
trap
.
"
"
That
’
s
his
problem
.
"
"
No
,
no
,
no
,
Yossarian
,
"
Major
Danby
disagreed
solicitously
.
"
It
’
s
your
problem
.
Because
if
you
don
’
t
go
through
with
the
deal
,
they
’
re
going
to
institute
court
-
martial
proceedings
as
soon
as
you
sign
out
of
the
hospital
.
"
Yossarian
thumbed
his
nose
at
Major
Danby
and
laughed
with
smug
elation
.
"
The
hell
they
will
!
Don
’
t
lie
to
me
,
Danby
.
They
wouldn
’
t
even
try
.
"
"
But
why
wouldn
’
t
they
?
"
inquired
Major
Danby
,
blinking
with
astonishment
.
"
Because
I
’
ve
really
got
them
over
a
barrel
now
.
There
’
s
an
official
report
that
says
I
was
stabbed
by
a
Nazi
assassin
trying
to
kill
them
.
They
’
d
certainly
look
silly
trying
to
court
-
martial
me
after
that
.
"
"
But
,
Yossarian
!
"
Major
Danby
exclaimed
.
"
There
’
s
another
official
report
that
says
you
were
stabbed
by
an
innocent
girl
in
the
course
of
extensive
black
-
market
operations
involving
acts
of
sabotage
and
the
sale
of
military
secrets
to
the
enemy
.
"
Yossarian
was
taken
back
severely
with
surprise
and
disappointment
.
"
Another
official
report
?
"
"
Yossarian
,
they
can
prepare
as
many
official
reports
as
they
want
and
choose
whichever
ones
they
need
on
any
given
occasion
.
Didn
’
t
you
know
that
?
"
"
Oh
,
dear
,
"
Yossarian
murmured
in
heavy
dejection
,
the
blood
draining
from
his
face
.
"
Oh
,
dear
.
"
Major
Danby
pressed
forward
avidly
with
a
look
of
vulturous
well
-
meaning
.
"
Yossarian
,
do
what
they
want
and
let
them
send
you
home
.
It
’
s
best
for
everyone
that
way
.
"
"
It
’
s
best
for
Cathcart
,
Korn
and
me
,
not
for
everyone
.
"
