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- Джозеф Хеллер
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- Уловка 22
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- Стр. 129/452
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"
We
did
.
"
Colonel
Cathcart
was
overjoyed
,
for
he
was
relieved
of
the
embarrassing
commitment
to
bomb
Bologna
without
blemish
to
the
reputation
for
valor
he
had
earned
by
volunteering
his
men
to
do
it
.
General
Dreedle
was
pleased
with
the
capture
of
Bologna
,
too
,
although
he
was
angry
with
Colonel
Moodus
for
waking
him
up
to
tell
him
about
it
.
Headquarters
was
also
pleased
and
decided
to
award
a
medal
to
the
officer
who
had
captured
the
city
.
There
was
no
officer
who
had
captured
the
city
,
so
they
gave
the
medal
to
General
Peckem
instead
,
because
General
Peckem
was
the
only
officer
with
sufficient
initiative
to
ask
for
it
.
As
soon
as
General
Peckem
had
received
his
medal
,
he
began
asking
for
increased
responsibilty
.
It
was
General
Peckem
’
s
opinion
that
all
combat
units
in
the
theater
should
be
placed
under
the
jurisdiction
of
the
Special
Service
Corps
,
of
which
General
Peckem
himself
was
the
commanding
officer
.
If
dropping
bombs
on
the
enemy
was
not
a
special
service
,
he
reflected
aloud
frequently
with
the
martyred
smile
of
sweet
reasonableness
that
was
his
loyal
confederate
in
every
dispute
,
then
he
could
not
help
wondering
what
in
the
world
was
.
With
amiable
regret
,
he
declined
the
offer
of
a
combat
post
under
General
Dreedle
.
"
Flying
combat
missions
for
General
Dreedle
is
not
exactly
what
I
had
in
mind
,
"
he
explained
indulgently
with
a
smooth
laugh
.
"
I
was
thinking
more
in
terms
of
replacing
General
Dreedle
,
or
perhaps
of
something
above
General
Dreedle
where
I
could
exercise
supervision
over
a
great
many
other
generals
too
.
You
see
,
my
most
precious
abilities
are
mainly
administrative
ones
.
I
have
a
happy
facility
for
getting
different
people
to
agree
.
"
"
He
has
a
happy
facility
for
getting
different
people
to
agree
what
a
prick
he
is
,
"
Colonel
Cargill
confided
invidiously
to
ex
-
P
.
F
.
C
.
Wintergreen
in
the
hope
that
ex
-
P
.
F
.
C
.
Wintergreen
would
spread
the
unfavorable
report
along
through
Twenty
-
seventh
Air
Force
Headquarters
.
"
If
anyone
deserves
that
combat
post
,
I
do
.
It
was
even
my
idea
that
we
ask
for
the
medal
.
"
"
You
really
want
to
go
into
combat
?
"
ex
-
P
.
F
.
C
.
Wintergreen
inquired
.
"
Combat
?
"
Colonel
Cargill
was
aghast
.
"
Oh
,
no
—
you
misunderstand
me
.
Of
course
,
I
wouldn
’
t
actually
mind
going
into
combat
,
but
my
best
abilities
are
mainly
administrative
ones
.
I
too
have
a
happy
facility
for
getting
different
people
to
agree
.
"
"
He
too
has
a
happy
facility
for
getting
different
people
to
agree
what
a
prick
he
is
,
"
ex
-
P
.
F
.
C
.
Wintergreen
confided
with
a
laugh
to
Yossarian
,
after
he
had
come
to
Pianosa
to
learn
if
it
was
really
true
about
Milo
and
the
Egyptian
cotton
.
"
If
anyone
deserves
a
promotion
,
I
do
.
"
Actually
,
he
had
risen
already
to
ex
-
corporal
,
having
shot
through
the
ranks
shortly
after
his
transfer
to
Twenty
-
seventh
Air
Force
Headquarters
as
a
mail
clerk
and
been
busted
right
down
to
private
for
making
odious
audible
comparisons
about
the
commissioned
officers
for
whom
he
worked
.
The
heady
taste
of
success
had
infused
him
further
with
morality
and
fired
him
with
ambition
for
loftier
attainments
.
"
Do
you
want
to
buy
some
Zippo
lighters
?
"
he
asked
Yossarian
.
"
They
were
stolen
right
from
quartermaster
.
"
