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Lydgate
knew
that
there
were
friends
who
would
believe
in
you
and
support
you
,
she
might
then
be
glad
that
you
should
stay
in
your
place
and
recover
your
hopes
and
do
what
you
meant
to
do
.
Perhaps
then
you
would
see
that
it
was
right
to
agree
with
what
I
proposed
about
your
continuing
at
the
Hospital
.
Surely
you
would
,
if
you
still
have
faith
in
it
as
a
means
of
making
your
knowledge
useful
?
"
Lydgate
did
not
answer
,
and
she
saw
that
he
was
debating
with
himself
.
"
You
need
not
decide
immediately
,
"
she
said
,
gently
.
"
A
few
days
hence
it
will
be
early
enough
for
me
to
send
my
answer
to
Mr
.
Bulstrode
.
"
Отключить рекламу
Lydgate
still
waited
,
but
at
last
turned
to
speak
in
his
most
decisive
tones
.
"
No
;
I
prefer
that
there
should
be
no
interval
left
for
wavering
.
I
am
no
longer
sure
enough
of
myself
I
mean
of
what
it
would
be
possible
for
me
to
do
under
the
changed
circumstances
of
my
life
.
It
would
be
dishonorable
to
let
others
engage
themselves
to
anything
serious
in
dependence
on
me
.
I
might
be
obliged
to
go
away
after
all
;
I
see
little
chance
of
anything
else
.
The
whole
thing
is
too
problematic
;
I
cannot
consent
to
be
the
cause
of
your
goodness
being
wasted
.
No
let
the
new
Hospital
be
joined
with
the
old
Infirmary
,
and
everything
go
on
as
it
might
have
done
if
I
had
never
come
.
I
have
kept
a
valuable
register
since
I
have
been
there
;
I
shall
send
it
to
a
man
who
will
make
use
of
it
,
"
he
ended
bitterly
.
"
I
can
think
of
nothing
for
a
long
while
but
getting
an
income
.
"
"
It
hurts
me
very
much
to
hear
you
speak
so
hopelessly
,
"
said
Dorothea
.
"
It
would
be
a
happiness
to
your
friends
,
who
believe
in
your
future
,
in
your
power
to
do
great
things
,
if
you
would
let
them
save
you
from
that
.
Think
how
much
money
I
have
;
it
would
be
like
taking
a
burthen
from
me
if
you
took
some
of
it
every
year
till
you
got
free
from
this
fettering
want
of
income
.
Why
should
not
people
do
these
things
?
It
is
so
difficult
to
make
shares
at
all
even
.
This
is
one
way
.
"
Отключить рекламу
"
God
bless
you
,
Mrs
.
Casaubon
!
"
said
Lydgate
,
rising
as
if
with
the
same
impulse
that
made
his
words
energetic
,
and
resting
his
arm
on
the
back
of
the
great
leather
chair
he
had
been
sitting
in
.
"
It
is
good
that
you
should
have
such
feelings
.
But
I
am
not
the
man
who
ought
to
allow
himself
to
benefit
by
them
.
I
have
not
given
guarantees
enough
.
I
must
not
at
least
sink
into
the
degradation
of
being
pensioned
for
work
that
I
never
achieved
.
It
is
very
clear
to
me
that
I
must
not
count
on
anything
else
than
getting
away
from
Middlemarch
as
soon
as
I
can
manage
it
.
I
should
not
be
able
for
a
long
while
,
at
the
very
best
,
to
get
an
income
here
,
and
and
it
is
easier
to
make
necessary
changes
in
a
new
place
.
I
must
do
as
other
men
do
,
and
think
what
will
please
the
world
and
bring
in
money
;
look
for
a
little
opening
in
the
London
crowd
,
and
push
myself
;
set
up
in
a
watering
-
place
,
or
go
to
some
southern
town
where
there
are
plenty
of
idle
English
,
and
get
myself
puffed
that
is
the
sort
of
shell
I
must
creep
into
and
try
to
keep
my
soul
alive
in
.
"
"
Now
that
is
not
brave
,
"
said
Dorothea
"
to
give
up
the
fight
.
"