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The
best
he
can
do
is
to
suppose
that
they
are
like
himself
.
Now
,
sitting
in
the
Place
,
out
of
the
wind
,
seeing
under
the
guardian
lights
the
tide
creep
in
,
black
from
the
dark
sky
,
I
wondered
whether
all
men
have
a
Place
,
or
need
a
Place
,
or
want
one
and
have
none
.
Sometimes
I
’
ve
seen
a
look
in
eyes
,
a
frenzied
animal
look
as
of
need
for
a
quiet
,
secret
place
where
soul
-
shivers
can
abate
,
where
a
man
is
one
and
can
take
stock
of
it
.
Of
course
I
know
of
the
theories
of
back
to
the
womb
and
the
death
-
wish
,
and
these
may
be
true
of
some
men
,
but
I
don
’
t
think
they
are
true
of
me
,
except
as
easy
ways
of
saying
something
that
isn
’
t
easy
.
I
call
whatever
happens
in
the
Place
"
taking
stock
.
"
Some
others
might
call
it
prayer
,
and
maybe
it
would
be
the
same
thing
.
I
don
’
t
believe
it
’
s
thought
.
If
I
wanted
to
make
a
picture
of
it
for
myself
,
it
would
be
a
wet
sheet
turning
and
flapping
in
a
lovely
wind
and
drying
and
sweetening
the
white
.
What
happens
is
right
for
me
,
whether
or
not
it
is
good
.
There
were
plenty
of
matters
to
consider
and
they
were
jumping
and
waving
their
hands
for
attention
like
kids
in
school
.
Then
I
heard
the
slow
puttering
of
a
boat
engine
,
a
onelunger
,
a
fishing
craft
.
Her
masthead
light
moved
south
beyond
the
Whitsun
rocks
.
I
had
to
put
everything
aside
until
she
turned
her
red
and
green
lights
safe
in
the
channel
,
a
local
boat
to
have
found
the
entrance
so
easily
.
She
dropped
anchor
in
the
shallows
and
two
men
came
ashore
in
her
skiff
.
Little
wavelets
brushed
the
beach
and
the
disturbed
gulls
took
time
to
settle
back
on
the
mooring
floats
.
Item
:
There
was
Mary
,
my
dear
,
to
think
of
,
asleep
with
the
smile
of
mystery
on
her
lips
.
I
hoped
she
wouldn
’
t
awaken
and
look
for
me
.
But
if
she
did
,
would
she
ever
tell
me
?
I
doubt
it
.
I
think
that
Mary
,
for
all
that
she
seems
to
tell
everything
,
tells
very
little
.
There
was
the
fortune
to
consider
.
Did
Mary
want
a
fortune
or
did
she
want
it
for
me
?
The
fact
that
it
was
a
fake
fortune
,
rigged
by
Margie
Young
-
Hunt
for
reasons
I
didn
’
t
know
,
made
no
difference
at
all
.
A
fake
fortune
was
just
as
good
as
any
and
it
is
possible
that
all
fortunes
are
a
little
fake
.
Any
man
of
reasonable
intelligence
can
make
money
if
that
’
s
what
he
wants
.
Mostly
it
’
s
women
or
clothes
or
admiration
he
really
wants
and
they
deflect
him
.
The
great
artists
of
finance
like
Morgan
and
Rockefeller
weren
’
t
deflected
.
They
wanted
and
got
money
,
just
simple
money
.
What
they
did
with
it
afterward
is
another
matter
.
I
’
ve
always
felt
they
got
scared
of
the
ghost
they
raised
and
tried
to
buy
it
off
.
Item
:
By
money
,
Mary
meant
new
curtains
and
sure
education
for
the
kids
and
holding
her
head
a
little
higher
and
,
face
it
,
being
proud
rather
than
a
little
ashamed
of
me
.
She
had
said
it
in
anger
and
it
was
true
.
Item
:
Did
I
want
money
?
Well
,
no
.
Something
in
me
hated
being
a
grocery
clerk
.
In
the
Army
I
made
captain
,
but
I
know
what
got
me
into
O
.
T
.
C
.
It
was
family
and
connections
.
I
wasn
’
t
picked
for
my
pretty
eyes
,
but
I
did
make
a
good
officer
,
a
good
officer
.
But
if
I
had
really
liked
command
,
imposing
my
will
on
others
and
seeing
them
jump
,
I
might
have
stayed
in
the
Army
and
I
’
d
have
been
a
colonel
by
now
.
But
I
didn
’
t
.
I
wanted
to
get
it
over
.
They
say
a
good
soldier
fights
a
battle
,
never
a
war
.
That
’
s
for
civilians
.
Item
:
Marullo
was
telling
me
the
truth
about
business
,
business
being
the
process
of
getting
money
.
And
Joey
Morphy
was
telling
it
straight
,
and
Mr
.
Baker
and
the
drummer
.
They
all
told
it
straight
.
Why
did
it
revolt
me
and
leave
a
taste
like
a
spoiled
egg
?
Am
I
so
good
,
or
so
kind
,
or
so
just
?
I
don
’
t
think
so
.
Am
I
so
proud
?
Well
,
there
’
s
some
of
that
.
Am
I
lazy
,
too
lazy
to
be
involved
?
There
’
s
an
awful
lot
of
inactive
kindness
which
is
nothing
but
laziness
,
not
wanting
any
trouble
,
confusion
,
or
effort
.
There
is
a
smell
and
a
feel
of
dawn
long
before
the
light
.
It
was
in
the
air
now
,
a
tempering
of
the
wind
;
a
new
star
or
a
planet
cleared
the
horizon
to
eastward
.
I
should
know
what
star
or
planet
but
I
don
’
t
.
The
wind
freshens
or
steadies
in
the
false
dawn
.
It
really
does
.
And
I
would
have
to
be
going
back
soon
.
This
rising
star
was
too
late
to
have
much
of
a
go
before
daylight
.
What
is
the
saying
—
"
The
stars
incline
,
they
do
not
command
"
?
Well
,
I
’
ve
heard
that
a
good
many
serious
financiers
go
to
astrologers
for
instruction
in
stock
purchase
.
Do
the
stars
incline
toward
a
bull
market
?
Is
A
.
T
.
and
T
.
influenced
by
the
stars
?
Nothing
as
sweet
and
remote
in
my
fortune
as
a
star
.
A
beat
-
up
tarot
deck
of
fortune
-
telling
cards
in
the
hands
of
an
idle
,
mischievous
woman
,
and
she
had
rigged
the
cards
.
Do
the
cards
incline
but
not
command
?
Well
,
the
cards
inclined
me
out
to
the
Place
in
the
middle
of
the
night
,
and
they
inclined
me
to
give
more
thought
than
I
wanted
to
,
to
a
subject
I
detested
.
That
’
s
quite
a
bit
of
inclining
right
there
.
Could
they
incline
me
to
a
business
cleverness
I
never
had
,
to
acquisitiveness
foreign
to
me
?
Could
I
incline
to
want
what
I
didn
’
t
want
?
There
are
the
eaters
and
the
eaten
.
That
’
s
a
good
rule
to
start
with
.
Are
the
eaters
more
immoral
than
the
eaten
?
In
the
end
all
are
eaten
—
all
—
gobbled
up
by
the
earth
,
even
the
fiercest
and
the
most
crafty
.
The
roosters
up
on
Clam
Hill
had
been
crowing
for
a
long
time
and
I
had
heard
and
not
heard
.
I
wished
I
could
stay
to
see
the
sun
rise
straight
out
from
the
Place
.
