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- Джек Лондон
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- Мартин Иден
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- Стр. 152/241
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"
Of
course
,
this
is
sheer
nonsense
.
It
comes
from
nervousness
,
from
an
overwrought
mind
.
But
the
point
is
:
Why
have
I
done
this
?
For
you
.
To
shorten
my
apprenticeship
.
To
compel
Success
to
hasten
.
And
my
apprenticeship
is
now
served
.
I
know
my
equipment
.
I
swear
that
I
learn
more
each
month
than
the
average
college
man
learns
in
a
year
.
I
know
it
,
I
tell
you
.
But
were
my
need
for
you
to
understand
not
so
desperate
I
should
not
tell
you
.
It
is
not
boasting
.
I
measure
the
results
by
the
books
.
Your
brothers
,
to
-
day
,
are
ignorant
barbarians
compared
with
me
and
the
knowledge
I
have
wrung
from
the
books
in
the
hours
they
were
sleeping
.
Long
ago
I
wanted
to
be
famous
.
I
care
very
little
for
fame
now
.
What
I
want
is
you
;
I
am
more
hungry
for
you
than
for
food
,
or
clothing
,
or
recognition
.
I
have
a
dream
of
laying
my
head
on
your
breast
and
sleeping
an
aeon
or
so
,
and
the
dream
will
come
true
ere
another
year
is
gone
.
"
His
power
beat
against
her
,
wave
upon
wave
;
and
in
the
moment
his
will
opposed
hers
most
she
felt
herself
most
strongly
drawn
toward
him
.
The
strength
that
had
always
poured
out
from
him
to
her
was
now
flowering
in
his
impassioned
voice
,
his
flashing
eyes
,
and
the
vigor
of
life
and
intellect
surging
in
him
.
And
in
that
moment
,
and
for
the
moment
,
she
was
aware
of
a
rift
that
showed
in
her
certitude
—
a
rift
through
which
she
caught
sight
of
the
real
Martin
Eden
,
splendid
and
invincible
;
and
as
animal
-
trainers
have
their
moments
of
doubt
,
so
she
,
for
the
instant
,
seemed
to
doubt
her
power
to
tame
this
wild
spirit
of
a
man
.
"
And
another
thing
,
"
he
swept
on
.
"
You
love
me
.
But
why
do
you
love
me
?
The
thing
in
me
that
compels
me
to
write
is
the
very
thing
that
draws
your
love
.
You
love
me
because
I
am
somehow
different
from
the
men
you
have
known
and
might
have
loved
.
I
was
not
made
for
the
desk
and
counting
-
house
,
for
petty
business
squabbling
,
and
legal
jangling
.
Make
me
do
such
things
,
make
me
like
those
other
men
,
doing
the
work
they
do
,
breathing
the
air
they
breathe
,
developing
the
point
of
view
they
have
developed
,
and
you
have
destroyed
the
difference
,
destroyed
me
,
destroyed
the
thing
you
love
.
My
desire
to
write
is
the
most
vital
thing
in
me
.
Had
I
been
a
mere
clod
,
neither
would
I
have
desired
to
write
,
nor
would
you
have
desired
me
for
a
husband
.
"
"
But
you
forget
,
"
she
interrupted
,
the
quick
surface
of
her
mind
glimpsing
a
parallel
.
"
There
have
been
eccentric
inventors
,
starving
their
families
while
they
sought
such
chimeras
as
perpetual
motion
.
Doubtless
their
wives
loved
them
,
and
suffered
with
them
and
for
them
,
not
because
of
but
in
spite
of
their
infatuation
for
perpetual
motion
.
"
"
True
,
"
was
the
reply
.
"
But
there
have
been
inventors
who
were
not
eccentric
and
who
starved
while
they
sought
to
invent
practical
things
;
and
sometimes
,
it
is
recorded
,
they
succeeded
.
Certainly
I
do
not
seek
any
impossibilities
—
"
"
You
have
called
it
‘
achieving
the
impossible
,
’
"
she
interpolated
.
"
I
spoke
figuratively
.
I
seek
to
do
what
men
have
done
before
me
—
to
write
and
to
live
by
my
writing
.
"
Her
silence
spurred
him
on
"
To
you
,
then
,
my
goal
is
as
much
a
chimera
as
perpetual
motion
?
"
he
demanded
.
He
read
her
answer
in
the
pressure
of
her
hand
on
his
—
the
pitying
mother
-
hand
for
the
hurt
child
.
And
to
her
,
just
then
,
he
was
the
hurt
child
,
the
infatuated
man
striving
to
achieve
the
impossible
.
Toward
the
close
of
their
talk
she
warned
him
again
of
the
antagonism
of
her
father
and
mother
.
