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- Дуглас Адамс
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"
You
want
to
talk
about
it
?
"
said
Ford
.
"
Yeah
,
OK
,
"
said
Zaphod
,
and
all
three
sat
down
and
ignored
the
scenes
that
came
and
went
around
them
.
"
I
figure
this
,
"
said
Zaphod
.
"
Whatever
happened
to
my
mind
,
I
did
it
.
And
I
did
it
in
such
a
way
that
it
would
n't
be
detected
by
the
government
screening
tests
.
And
I
was
n't
to
know
anything
about
it
myself
.
Pretty
crazy
,
right
?
"
The
other
two
nodded
in
agreement
.
"
So
I
reckon
,
what
's
so
secret
that
I
ca
n't
let
anybody
know
I
know
it
,
not
the
Galactic
Government
,
not
even
myself
?
And
the
answer
is
I
do
n't
know
.
Obviously
.
But
I
put
a
few
things
together
and
I
can
begin
to
guess
.
When
did
I
decide
to
run
for
President
?
Shortly
after
the
death
of
President
Yooden
Vranx
.
You
remember
Yooden
,
Ford
?
"
"
Yeah
,
"
said
Ford
,
"
he
was
that
guy
we
met
when
we
were
kids
,
the
Arcturan
captain
.
He
was
a
gas
.
He
gave
us
conkers
when
you
bust
your
way
into
his
megafreighter
.
Said
you
were
the
most
amazing
kid
he
'd
ever
met
.
"
"
What
's
all
this
?
"
said
Trillian
.
"
Ancient
history
,
"
said
Ford
,
"
when
we
were
kids
together
on
Betelgeuse
.
The
Arcturan
megafreighters
used
to
carry
most
of
the
bulky
trade
between
the
Galactic
Centre
and
the
outlying
regions
.
The
Betelgeuse
trading
scouts
used
to
find
the
markets
and
the
Arcturans
would
supply
them
.
There
was
a
lot
of
trouble
with
space
pirates
before
they
were
wiped
out
in
the
Dordellis
wars
,
and
the
megafreighters
had
to
be
equipped
with
the
most
fantastic
defence
shields
known
to
Galactic
science
.
They
were
real
brutes
of
ships
,
and
huge
.
In
orbit
round
a
planet
they
would
eclipse
the
sun
.
"
One
day
,
young
Zaphod
here
decides
to
raid
one
.
On
a
tri-jet
scooter
designed
for
stratosphere
work
,
a
mere
kid
.
I
mean
forget
it
,
it
was
crazier
than
a
mad
monkey
.
I
went
along
for
the
ride
because
I
'd
got
some
very
safe
money
on
him
not
doing
it
,
and
did
n't
want
him
coming
back
with
fake
evidence
.
So
what
happens
?
We
got
in
his
tri-jet
which
he
had
souped
up
into
something
totally
other
,
crossed
three
parsecs
in
a
matter
of
weeks
,
bust
our
way
into
a
megafreighter
I
still
do
n't
know
how
,
marched
on
to
the
bridge
waving
toy
pistols
and
demanded
conkers
.
A
wilder
thing
I
have
not
known
.
Lost
me
a
year
's
pocket
money
.
For
what
?
Conkers
.
"
"
The
captain
was
this
really
amazing
guy
,
Yooden
Vranx
,
"
said
Zaphod
.
"
He
gave
us
food
,
booze
--
stuff
from
really
weird
parts
of
the
Galaxy
--
lots
of
conkers
of
course
,
and
we
had
just
the
most
incredible
time
.
Then
he
teleported
us
back
.
Into
the
maximum
security
wing
of
Betelgeuse
state
prison
.
He
was
a
cool
guy
.
Went
on
to
become
President
of
the
Galaxy
.
"
