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The
Hitchhiker
's
Guide
to
the
Galaxy
is
a
very
unevenly
edited
book
and
contains
many
passages
that
simply
seemed
to
its
editors
like
a
good
idea
at
the
time
.
One
of
these
(
the
one
Arthur
now
came
across
)
supposedly
relates
the
experiences
of
one
Veet
Voojagig
,
a
quiet
young
student
at
the
University
of
Maximegalon
,
who
pursued
a
brilliant
academic
career
studying
ancient
philology
,
transformational
ethics
and
the
wave
harmonic
theory
of
historical
perception
,
and
then
,
after
a
night
of
drinking
Pan
Galactic
Gargle
Blasters
with
Zaphod
Beeblebrox
,
became
increasingly
obsessed
with
the
problem
of
what
had
happened
to
all
the
biros
he
'd
bought
over
the
past
few
years
.
There
followed
a
long
period
of
painstaking
research
during
which
he
visited
all
the
major
centres
of
biro
loss
throughout
the
galaxy
and
eventually
came
up
with
a
quaint
little
theory
which
quite
caught
the
public
imagination
at
the
time
.
Somewhere
in
the
cosmos
,
he
said
,
along
with
all
the
planets
inhabited
by
humanoids
,
reptiloids
,
fishoids
,
walking
treeoids
and
superintelligent
shades
of
the
colour
blue
,
there
was
also
a
planet
entirely
given
over
to
biro
life
forms
.
And
it
was
to
this
planet
that
unattended
biros
would
make
their
way
,
slipping
away
quietly
through
wormholes
in
space
to
a
world
where
they
knew
they
could
enjoy
a
uniquely
biroid
lifestyle
,
responding
to
highly
biro-oriented
stimuli
,
and
generally
leading
the
biro
equivalent
of
the
good
life
.
And
as
theories
go
this
was
all
very
fine
and
pleasant
until
Veet
Voojagig
suddenly
claimed
to
have
found
this
planet
,
and
to
have
worked
there
for
a
while
driving
a
limousine
for
a
family
of
cheap
green
retractables
,
whereupon
he
was
taken
away
,
locked
up
,
wrote
a
book
,
and
was
finally
sent
into
tax
exile
,
which
is
the
usual
fate
reserved
for
those
who
are
determined
to
make
a
fool
of
themselves
in
public
.
When
one
day
an
expedition
was
sent
to
the
spatial
coordinates
that
Voojagig
had
claimed
for
this
planet
they
discovered
only
a
small
asteroid
inhabited
by
a
solitary
old
man
who
claimed
repeatedly
that
nothing
was
true
,
though
he
was
later
discovered
to
be
lying
.
There
did
,
however
,
remain
the
question
of
both
the
mysterious
60,000
Altairan
dollars
paid
yearly
into
his
Brantisvogan
bank
account
,
and
of
course
Zaphod
Beeblebrox
's
highly
profitable
second-hand
biro
business
.
Arthur
read
this
,
and
put
the
book
down
.
The
robot
still
sat
there
,
completely
inert
.
Arthur
got
up
and
walked
to
the
top
of
the
crater
.
He
walked
around
the
crater
.
He
watched
two
suns
set
magnificently
over
Magrathea
.