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"

No

more

tests

.

I

don

’

t

want

to

take

any

more

tests

.

"

"

All

right

,

Charlie

.

We

’

ll

stop

for

today

.

"

"

Not

just

for

today

.

I

’

m

not

coming

back

here

any

more

.

Whatever

there

is

left

in

me

that

you

need

,

you

can

get

from

the

progress

reports

.

I

’

m

through

running

the

maze

.

I

’

m

not

a

guinea

pig

any

more

.

I

’

ve

done

enough

.

I

want

to

be

left

alone

now

.

"

Отключить рекламу

"

All

right

,

Charlie

.

I

understand

.

"

"

No

,

you

don

’

t

understand

because

it

isn

’

t

happening

to

you

,

and

no

one

can

understand

but

me

.

I

don

’

t

blame

you

.

You

’

ve

got

your

job

to

do

,

and

your

Ph

.

D

.

to

get

,

and

—

oh

,

yes

,

don

’

t

tell

me

,

I

know

you

’

re

in

this

largely

out

of

love

of

humanity

,

but

still

you

’

ve

got

your

life

to

live

and

we

don

’

t

happen

to

belong

on

the

same

level

.

I

passed

your

floor

on

the

way

up

,

and

now

I

’

m

passing

it

on

the

way

down

,

and

I

don

’

t

think

I

’

ll

be

taking

this

elevator

again

.

So

let

’

s

just

say

good

-

bye

here

and

now

.

"

"

Don

’

t

you

think

you

should

talk

to

Dr

.

—

"

"

Say

good

-

bye

to

everyone

for

me

,

will

you

?

I

dont

feel

like

facing

any

of

them

again

.

"

Before

he

could

say

any

more

or

try

to

stop

me

,

I

was

out

of

the

lab

,

and

I

caught

the

elevator

down

and

out

of

Beekman

for

the

last

time

.

October

7

Отключить рекламу

Strauss

tried

to

see

me

again

this

morning

,

but

I

wouldn

’

t

open

the

door

.

I

want

to

be

left

to

myself

now

.

It

’

s

a

strange

sensation

to

pick

up

a

book

you

read

and

enjoyed

just

a

few

months

ago

and

discover

you

don

’

t

re

member

it

.

I

recall

how

wonderful

I

thought

Milton

was

.

When

I

picked

up

Paradise

Lost

I

could

only

remember

it

was

about

Adam

and

Eve

and

the

Tree

of

Knowledge

,

but

now

I

couldn

’

t

make

sense

of

it

.

I

stood

up

and

closed

my

eyes

and

saw

Charlie

—

my

self

—

six

or

seven

years

old

,

sitting

at

the

dinner

table

with

a

schoolbook

,

learning

to

read

,

saying

the

words

over

and

over

with

my

mother

sitting

beside

him

,

beside

me

.

.

.

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