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- Даниэл Киз
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- Цветы для Элджернона
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- Стр. 107/233
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Now
I
can
see
where
I
got
the
unusual
motivation
for
becoming
smart
that
so
amazed
everyone
at
first
.
It
was
something
Rose
Gordon
lived
with
day
and
night
.
Her
fear
,
her
guilt
,
her
shame
that
Charlie
was
a
moron
.
Her
dream
that
something
could
be
done
.
The
urgent
question
always
:
whose
fault
was
it
,
hers
or
Matt
’
s
?
Only
after
Norma
proved
to
her
that
she
was
capable
of
having
normal
children
,
and
that
I
was
a
freak
,
did
she
stop
trying
to
make
me
over
.
But
I
guess
I
never
stopped
wanting
to
be
the
smart
boy
she
wanted
me
to
be
,
so
that
she
would
love
me
.
A
funny
thing
about
Guarino
.
I
should
resent
him
for
what
he
did
to
me
,
and
for
taking
advantage
of
Rose
and
Matt
,
but
somehow
I
can
’
t
.
After
that
first
day
,
he
was
al
ways
pleasant
to
me
.
There
was
always
the
pat
on
the
shoulder
,
the
smile
,
the
encouraging
word
that
came
my
way
so
rarely
.
He
treated
me
—
even
then
—
as
a
human
being
.
It
may
sound
like
ingratitude
,
but
that
is
one
of
the
things
that
I
resent
here
—
the
attitude
that
I
am
a
guinea
pig
.
Nemur
’
s
constant
references
to
having
made
me
what
I
am
,
or
that
someday
there
will
be
others
like
me
who
will
become
real
human
beings
.
How
can
I
make
him
understand
that
he
did
not
cre
ate
me
?
He
makes
the
same
mistake
as
the
others
when
they
look
at
a
feeble
-
minded
person
and
laugh
because
they
don
’
t
understand
there
are
human
feelings
involved
.
He
doesn
’
t
realize
that
I
was
a
person
before
I
came
here
.
I
am
learning
to
control
my
resentment
,
not
to
be
so
impatient
,
to
wait
for
things
.
I
guess
I
’
m
growing
up
.
Each
day
I
learn
more
and
more
about
myself
,
and
the
memo
ries
that
began
as
ripples
now
wash
over
me
in
high
-
breaking
waves
.
.
.
.
June
11
The
confusion
began
from
the
moment
we
arrived
at
the
Chalmers
Hotel
in
Chicago
and
discovered
that
by
error
our
rooms
would
not
be
vacant
until
the
next
night
and
until
then
we
would
have
to
stay
at
the
nearby
Independence
Hotel
.
Nemur
was
furious
.
He
took
it
as
a
personal
affront
and
quarrelled
with
everyone
in
the
line
of
hotel
command
from
the
bellhop
to
the
manager
.
We
waited
in
the
lobby
as
each
hotel
official
went
off
in
search
of
his
superior
to
see
what
could
be
done
.
