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- Чарльз Диккенс
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Next
day
I
set
myself
to
get
the
boat
.
It
was
soon
done
,
and
the
boat
was
brought
round
to
the
Temple
stairs
,
and
lay
where
I
could
reach
her
within
a
minute
or
two
.
Then
,
I
began
to
go
out
as
for
training
and
practice
:
sometimes
alone
,
sometimes
with
Herbert
.
I
was
often
out
in
cold
,
rain
,
and
sleet
,
but
nobody
took
much
note
of
me
after
I
had
been
out
a
few
times
.
At
first
,
I
kept
above
Blackfriars
Bridge
;
but
as
the
hours
of
the
tide
changed
,
I
took
towards
London
Bridge
.
It
was
Old
London
Bridge
in
those
days
,
and
at
certain
states
of
the
tide
there
was
a
race
and
fall
of
water
there
which
gave
it
a
bad
reputation
.
But
I
knew
well
enough
how
to
"
shoot
’
the
bridge
after
seeing
it
done
,
and
so
began
to
row
about
among
the
shipping
in
the
Pool
,
and
down
to
Erith
.
The
first
time
I
passed
Mill
Pond
Bank
,
Herbert
and
I
were
pulling
a
pair
of
oars
;
and
,
both
in
going
and
returning
,
we
saw
the
blind
towards
the
east
come
down
.
Herbert
was
rarely
there
less
frequently
than
three
times
in
a
week
,
and
he
never
brought
me
a
single
word
of
intelligence
that
was
at
all
alarming
.
Still
,
I
knew
that
there
was
cause
for
alarm
,
and
I
could
not
get
rid
of
the
notion
of
being
watched
.
Once
received
,
it
is
a
haunting
idea
;
how
many
undesigning
persons
I
suspected
of
watching
me
,
it
would
be
hard
to
calculate
In
short
,
I
was
always
full
of
fears
for
the
rash
man
who
was
in
hiding
.
Herbert
had
sometimes
said
to
me
that
he
found
it
pleasant
to
stand
at
one
of
our
windows
after
dark
,
when
the
tide
was
running
down
,
and
to
think
that
it
was
flowing
,
with
everything
it
bore
,
towards
Clara
.
But
I
thought
with
dread
that
it
was
flowing
towards
Magwitch
,
and
that
any
black
mark
on
its
surface
might
be
his
pursuers
,
going
swiftly
,
silently
,
and
surely
,
to
take
him
.
Some
weeks
passed
without
bringing
any
change
.
We
waited
for
Wemmick
,
and
he
made
no
sign
.
If
I
had
never
known
him
out
of
Little
Britain
,
and
had
never
enjoyed
the
privilege
of
being
on
a
familiar
footing
at
the
Castle
,
I
might
have
doubted
him
;
not
so
for
a
moment
,
knowing
him
as
I
did
.
My
worldly
affairs
began
to
wear
a
gloomy
appearance
,
and
I
was
pressed
for
money
by
more
than
one
creditor
.
Even
I
myself
began
to
know
the
want
of
money
(
I
mean
of
ready
money
in
my
own
pocket
)
,
and
to
relieve
it
by
converting
some
easily
spared
articles
of
jewelery
into
cash
.
But
I
had
quite
determined
that
it
would
be
a
heartless
fraud
to
take
more
money
from
my
patron
in
the
existing
state
of
my
uncertain
thoughts
and
plans
.
Therefore
,
I
had
sent
him
the
unopened
pocket
-
book
by
Herbert
,
to
hold
in
his
own
keeping
,
and
I
felt
a
kind
of
satisfaction
—
whether
it
was
a
false
kind
or
a
true
,
I
hardly
know
—
in
not
having
profited
by
his
generosity
since
his
revelation
of
himself
.
As
the
time
wore
on
,
an
impression
settled
heavily
upon
me
that
Estella
was
married
.
Fearful
of
having
it
confirmed
,
though
it
was
all
but
a
conviction
,
I
avoided
the
newspapers
,
and
begged
Herbert
(
to
whom
I
had
confided
the
circumstances
of
our
last
interview
)
never
to
speak
of
her
to
me
.
Why
I
hoarded
up
this
last
wretched
little
rag
of
the
robe
of
hope
that
was
rent
and
given
to
the
winds
,
how
do
I
know
?
Why
did
you
who
read
this
,
commit
that
not
dissimilar
inconsistency
of
your
own
last
year
,
last
month
,
last
week
?
It
was
an
unhappy
life
that
I
lived
;
and
its
one
dominant
anxiety
,
towering
over
all
its
other
anxieties
,
like
a
high
mountain
above
a
range
of
mountains
,
never
disappeared
from
my
view
.
Still
,
no
new
cause
for
fear
arose
.
Let
me
start
from
my
bed
as
I
would
,
with
the
terror
fresh
upon
me
that
he
was
discovered
;
let
me
sit
listening
,
as
I
would
with
dread
,
for
Herbert
’
s
returning
step
at
night
,
lest
it
should
be
fleeter
than
ordinary
,
and
winged
with
evil
news
—
for
all
that
,
and
much
more
to
like
purpose
,
the
round
of
things
went
on
.
Condemned
to
inaction
and
a
state
of
constant
restlessness
and
suspense
,
I
rowed
about
in
my
boat
,
and
waited
,
waited
,
waited
,
as
I
best
could
.
There
were
states
of
the
tide
when
,
having
been
down
the
river
,
I
could
not
get
back
through
the
eddy
-
chafed
arches
and
starlings
of
old
London
Bridge
;
then
,
I
left
my
boat
at
a
wharf
near
the
Custom
House
,
to
be
brought
up
afterwards
to
the
Temple
stairs
.
I
was
not
averse
to
doing
this
,
as
it
served
to
make
me
and
my
boat
a
commoner
incident
among
the
water
-
side
people
there
.
From
this
slight
occasion
sprang
two
meetings
that
I
have
now
to
tell
of
.
One
afternoon
,
late
in
the
month
of
February
,
I
came
ashore
at
the
wharf
at
dusk
.
I
had
pulled
down
as
far
as
Greenwich
with
the
ebb
tide
,
and
had
turned
with
the
tide
.
It
had
been
a
fine
bright
day
,
but
had
become
foggy
as
the
sun
dropped
,
and
I
had
had
to
feel
my
way
back
among
the
shipping
,
pretty
carefully
.
Both
in
going
and
returning
,
I
had
seen
the
signal
in
his
window
,
All
well
.
