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"
It
’
s
over
.
"
"
Should
I
stay
?
"
"
Of
course
.
Please
.
"
"
You
’
re
not
just
using
me
?
I
’
ve
read
all
those
love
poems
.
.
.
to
Lydia
.
"
"
I
was
in
love
.
And
I
’
m
not
using
you
.
"
Mindy
pressed
her
body
against
me
and
kissed
me
.
It
was
a
long
kiss
.
My
cock
rose
.
I
had
recently
been
taking
a
lot
of
vitamin
E
.
I
had
my
own
ideas
about
sex
.
I
was
constantly
horny
and
masturbated
continually
.
I
’
d
make
love
to
Lydia
and
then
come
back
to
my
place
and
masturbate
in
the
morning
.
The
thought
of
sex
as
something
forbidden
excited
me
beyond
all
reason
.
It
was
like
one
animal
knifing
another
into
submission
.
When
I
came
I
felt
it
was
in
the
face
of
everything
decent
,
white
sperm
dripping
down
over
the
heads
and
souls
of
my
dead
parents
.
If
I
had
been
born
a
woman
I
would
certainly
have
been
a
prostitute
.
Since
I
had
been
born
a
man
,
I
craved
women
constantly
,
the
lower
the
better
.
And
yet
women
-
good
women
-
frightened
me
because
they
eventually
wanted
your
soul
,
and
what
was
left
of
mine
,
I
wanted
to
keep
.
Basically
I
craved
prostitutes
,
base
women
,
because
they
were
deadly
and
hard
and
made
no
personal
demands
.
Nothing
was
lost
when
they
left
.
Yet
at
the
same
time
I
yearned
for
a
gentle
,
good
woman
,
despite
the
overwhelming
price
.
Either
way
I
was
lost
.
A
strong
man
would
give
up
both
.
I
wasn
’
t
strong
.
So
I
continued
to
struggle
with
women
,
with
the
idea
of
women
.
Mindy
and
I
finished
the
bottle
and
then
went
to
bed
.
I
kissed
her
for
a
while
,
then
apologized
,
and
drew
away
.
I
was
too
drunk
to
perform
.
One
hell
of
a
great
lover
.
I
promised
her
many
great
experiences
in
the
near
future
,
then
fell
asleep
with
her
body
pressed
against
me
.
In
the
morning
I
awakened
,
sickened
I
looked
at
Mindy
,
naked
next
to
me
.
Even
then
,
after
all
the
drinking
,
she
was
a
miracle
.
Never
had
I
known
a
young
girl
so
beautiful
and
at
the
same
time
so
gentle
and
intelligent
.
Where
were
her
men
?
Where
had
they
failed
?
