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All
night
long
,
your
thoughts
are
on
the
air
.
Am
I
sleeping
?
Have
I
slept
at
all
?
This
is
the
insomnia
.
Try
to
relax
a
little
more
with
every
breath
out
,
but
your
heart
's
still
racing
and
your
thoughts
tornado
in
your
head
.
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Nothing
works
.
Not
guided
meditation
.
You
're
in
Ireland
.
Not
counting
sheep
.
You
count
up
the
days
,
hours
,
minutes
since
you
can
remember
falling
asleep
.
Your
doctor
laughed
.
Nobody
ever
died
from
lack
of
sleep
.
The
old
bruised
fruit
way
your
face
looks
,
you
'd
think
you
were
dead
.
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After
three
o'clock
in
the
morning
in
a
motel
bed
in
Seattle
,
it
's
too
late
for
you
to
find
a
cancer
support
group
.
Too
late
to
find
some
little
blue
Amytal
Sodium
capsules
or
lipstick-red
Seconals
,
the
whole
Valley
of
the
Dolls
playset
.
After
three
in
the
morning
,
you
ca
n't
get
into
a
fight
club
.
You
've
got
to
find
Tyler
.
You
've
got
to
get
some
sleep
.