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Their
choice
amazed
everybody
but
me
:
modern
thinkers
considered
it
unnecessary
to
perceive
reality
,
and
modern
physicists
considered
it
unnecessary
to
think
.
I
knew
better
;
what
amazed
me
was
that
these
children
knew
it
,
too
.
.
.
Robert
Stadler
was
head
of
the
Department
of
Physics
,
as
I
was
head
of
the
Department
of
Philosophy
.
He
and
I
suspended
all
rules
and
restrictions
for
these
three
students
,
we
spared
them
all
the
routine
,
unessential
courses
,
we
loaded
them
with
nothing
but
the
hardest
tasks
,
and
we
cleared
their
way
to
major
in
our
two
subjects
within
their
four
years
.
They
worked
for
it
.
And
,
during
those
four
years
,
they
worked
for
their
living
,
besides
.
Francisco
and
Ragnar
were
receiving
allowances
from
their
parents
,
John
had
nothing
,
but
all
three
of
them
held
part
-
time
jobs
to
earn
their
own
experience
and
money
.
Francisco
worked
in
a
copper
foundry
,
John
worked
in
a
railroad
roundhouse
,
and
Ragnar
—
no
,
Miss
Taggart
,
Ragnar
was
not
the
least
,
but
the
most
studiously
sedate
of
the
three
—
he
worked
as
clerk
in
the
university
library
.
They
had
time
for
everything
they
wanted
,
but
no
time
for
people
or
for
any
communal
campus
activities
.
They
.
.
.
Ragnar
!
"
he
interrupted
himself
suddenly
,
sharply
.
"
Don
’
t
sit
on
the
ground
!
"
Danneskjold
had
slipped
down
and
was
now
sitting
on
the
grass
,
with
his
head
leaning
against
Kay
Ludlow
’
s
knees
.
He
rose
obediently
,
chuckling
.
Dr
.
Akston
smiled
with
a
touch
of
apology
.
"
It
’
s
an
old
habit
of
mine
,
"
he
explained
to
Dagny
.
"
A
‘
conditioned
’
reflex
,
I
guess
.
I
used
to
tell
him
that
in
those
college
years
,
when
I
’
d
catch
him
sitting
on
the
ground
in
my
back
yard
,
on
cold
,
foggy
evenings
—
he
was
reckless
that
way
,
he
made
me
worry
,
he
should
have
known
it
was
dangerous
and
—
"
He
stopped
abruptly
;
he
read
in
Dagny
’
s
startled
eyes
the
same
thought
as
his
own
:
the
thought
of
the
kind
of
dangers
the
adult
Ragnar
had
chosen
to
face
.
Dr
.
Akston
shrugged
,
spreading
his
hands
in
a
gesture
of
helpless
self
-
mockery
.
Kay
Ludlow
smiled
at
him
in
understanding
.
"
My
house
stood
just
outside
the
campus
,
"
he
continued
,
sighing
,
"
on
a
tall
bluff
over
Lake
Erie
.
We
spent
many
evenings
together
,
the
four
of
us
.
We
would
sit
just
like
this
,
in
my
back
yard
,
on
the
nights
of
early
fall
or
in
the
spring
,
only
instead
of
this
granite
mountainside
,
we
had
the
spread
of
the
lake
before
us
,
stretching
off
into
a
peacefully
unlimited
distance
.
I
had
to
work
harder
on
those
nights
than
in
any
classroom
,
answering
all
the
questions
they
’
d
ask
me
,
discussing
the
kind
of
issues
they
’
d
raise
.
About
midnight
,
I
would
fix
some
hot
chocolate
and
force
them
to
drink
it
—
the
one
thing
I
suspected
was
that
they
never
took
time
to
eat
properly
—
and
then
we
’
d
go
on
talking
,
while
the
lake
vanished
into
solid
darkness
and
the
sky
seemed
lighter
than
the
earth
.
There
were
a
few
times
when
we
stayed
there
till
I
noticed
suddenly
that
the
sky
was
turning
darker
and
the
lake
was
growing
pale
and
we
were
within
a
few
sentences
of
daylight
.
I
should
have
known
better
,
I
knew
that
they
weren
’
t
getting
enough
sleep
as
it
was
,
but
I
forgot
it
occasionally
,
I
lost
my
sense
of
time
—
you
see
,
when
they
were
there
,
I
always
felt
as
if
it
were
early
morning
and
a
long
,
inexhaustible
day
were
stretching
ahead
before
us
.
They
never
spoke
of
what
they
wished
they
might
do
in
the
future
,
they
never
wondered
whether
some
mysterious
omnipotence
had
favored
them
with
some
unknowable
talent
to
achieve
the
things
they
wanted
—
they
spoke
of
what
they
would
do
.
Does
affection
tend
to
make
one
a
coward
?
I
know
that
the
only
times
I
felt
fear
were
occasional
moments
when
I
listened
to
them
and
thought
of
what
the
world
was
becoming
and
what
they
would
have
to
encounter
in
the
future
.
Fear
?
Yes
—
but
it
was
more
than
fear
.
It
was
the
kind
of
emotion
that
makes
men
capable
of
killing
—
when
I
thought
that
the
purpose
of
the
world
’
s
trend
was
to
destroy
these
children
,
that
these
three
sons
of
mine
were
marked
for
immolation
.
Oh
yes
,
I
would
have
killed
—
but
whom
was
there
to
kill
?
It
was
everyone
and
no
one
,
there
was
no
single
enemy
,
no
center
and
no
villain
,
it
was
not
the
simpering
social
worker
incapable
of
earning
a
penny
or
the
thieving
bureaucrat
scared
of
his
own
shadow
,
it
was
the
whole
of
the
earth
rolling
into
an
obscenity
of
horror
,
pushed
by
the
hand
of
every
would
-
be
decent
man
who
believed
that
need
is
holier
than
ability
,
and
pity
is
holier
than
justice
.
But
these
were
only
occasional
moments
.
It
was
not
my
constant
feeling
.
I
listened
to
my
children
and
I
knew
that
nothing
would
defeat
them
.
I
looked
at
them
,
as
they
sat
in
my
back
yard
,
and
beyond
my
house
there
were
the
tall
,
dark
buildings
of
what
was
still
a
monument
to
unenslaved
thought
—
the
Patrick
Henry
University
—
and
farther
in
the
distance
there
were
the
lights
of
Cleveland
,
the
orange
glow
of
steel
mills
behind
batteries
of
smokestacks
,
the
twinkling
red
dots
of
radio
towers
,
the
long
white
rays
of
airports
on
the
black
edge
of
the
sky
—
and
I
thought
that
in
the
name
of
any
greatness
that
had
ever
existed
and
moved
this
world
,
the
greatness
of
which
they
were
the
last
descendants
,
they
would
win
.
.
.
I
remember
one
night
when
I
noticed
that
John
had
been
silent
for
a
long
time
—
and
I
saw
that
he
had
fallen
asleep
,
stretched
there
on
the
ground
.
The
two
others
confessed
that
he
had
not
slept
for
three
days
.
I
sent
the
two
of
them
home
at
once
,
but
I
didn
’
t
have
the
heart
to
disturb
him
.
It
was
a
warm
spring
night
,
I
brought
a
blanket
to
cover
him
,
and
I
let
him
sleep
where
he
was
.
I
sat
there
beside
him
till
morning
—
and
as
I
watched
his
face
in
the
starlight
,
then
the
first
ray
of
the
sun
on
his
untroubled
forehead
and
closed
eyelids
,
what
I
experienced
was
not
a
prayer
,
I
do
not
pray
,
but
that
state
of
spirit
at
which
a
prayer
is
a
misguided
attempt
:
a
full
,
confident
,
affirming
self
-
dedication
to
my
love
of
the
right
,
to
the
certainty
that
the
right
would
win
and
that
this
boy
would
have
the
kind
of
future
he
deserved
.
"
He
moved
his
arm
,
pointing
to
the
valley
.
